How to Spot a Bully (and What to do About it)

Chances are, most of us have encountered difficult personalities in the workplace. However, when the behavior rises to the level of bullying this often presents a major challenge for managers and HR professionals as they navigate the best approach. One problem is that workplace bullies are often more sophisticated than your average schoolyard bully. Workplace bullies may leave you feeling gaslit—causing you to question whether they have done anything wrong in the first place. Moreover, rude, subtly disrespectful, and unprofessional behavior does not always fit neatly into a formal policy violation leaving managers feeling stuck.

What are the Signs of a Workplace Bully?

1. They publicly shame or embarrass others. Bullies often find ways to belittle others, particularly in public. Sometimes they do this in a subtle or passive aggressive manner and then suggest that they are only joking or that the other person needs to lighten up. This is different from an employee with good intentions who accidentally says something offensive or makes someone feel bad. One characteristic of a bully is the inability to acknowledge their mistakes nor see the other person’s perspective.
2. They take all the credit or fail to give credit. What lies at the heart of bullying is often underlying insecurity. Bullies typically feel the need to take all of the credit for others’ accomplishments, or they may fail to acknowledge another coworker’s hard work, or give credence to their ideas. This is an even bigger problem if the bully is in a supervisory role, leading to employee disengagement and burnout.
3. They project their behavior onto others. Oftentimes when a bully is confronted about their alleged behavior they suggest that everyone else is also engaging in the same conduct they have been accused of. This can leave managers feeling stuck in a “he said, she said” situation. It is important to pay close attention to whether they can actually provide specific examples involving others, and how they reflect on their own role in the workplace conflict.
4. They try to turn others against you. When a bully has decided to target someone—sometimes for no good reason at all—they will make attempts to turn others against that person. They may lie about the individual, take things out of context, or attempt to sabotage their work. Unfortunately, this can create a rumor circle that is difficult to overcome when allowed to spread.
5. They create an intimidating, threatening, or hostile work environment. Sometimes bullies are bold enough to venture into illegal conduct, such as by making threats of workplace violence or targeting someone based on a protected class. This is often when bullying becomes harassment and it is critical that management investigates and corrects the issue promptly, to mitigate liability and protect other employees.

How to Address Workplace Bullies

If you are dealing with an individual that checks any or all of these boxes, the first question managers should ask can include:

• Is this the first issue we have had with this person, or is it repeated behavior?
• Does it appear they are acting intentionally or are they tone deaf?
• When confronted, does this person take accountability and show an intention to change?
• Or, do they deflect or appear to only pay lip service to doing better next time?

The answers to these questions are important when assessing whether you will attempt to coach this person to success, or if you have reached the end of the road. The worst situation occurs when a manager is unsure of how to approach a bully and fails to confront the issue for a while. This is never a good idea because just one problematic employee can vastly change your work culture, and lead to employee dissatisfaction and retention issues. Unfortunately, many employees begin to assume that the bully is protected and begin to distrust management and Human Resources. Once trust is lost amongst staff, it is very difficult to gain it back.

Managers need to remember that they do not have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that an employee is engaged in bullying. Rather, managers just need to assess whether it is more likely than not taking into account all employee reports and other evidence, that bullying occurred and a policy was violated. Rude, unprofessional, or disrespectful behavior is often a violation of an employer’s code of conduct and/or harassment and discrimination policies. Make sure to document each incident, as it may become clear the bullying behavior is adding up.

If this article rang true, consider:

• Whether your employee could benefit from CEA’s professional coaching services.
• Let us know if you need assistance in handling an internal investigation—we can walk you through all of the steps from A-Z.

Members can also nip bad behavior in the bud and find additional guidance in our Coaching and Discipline in the Workplace Tool Kit.